1. Superior audio-visual entertainment
Jeremy being hit with an envelope, because apparently that man’s relationship can’t ‘survive 2 lie detectors and a DNA test’
Some would say sleeping through the morning episode of Jeremy Kyle and catching up on it using ITV player was a low point in Freast’s lives. We find that quality programming such Jezza, ‘Tool Academy,’ and ‘My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding’ are apt for filling the gap which some would say should taken up by academia. Freast’s highest accolade has to be shared equally between ‘Sun sex and suspicious parents’ and ‘Teens tie the knot,’ both of which Freast reckon could be key guides for living your life.
2. Being extra-curricular
Cane fighting society
Freast have tried a myriad of activities in the last two years of higher education. One highlight was probably Keast attempting mixed lacrosse for the first and only time, being run down and brutally attacked by LADS with sticks. Other activities which Freast have yet to attend but for some reason are on the mailing list for include ‘juggling society,’ ‘cane fighting society,’ and the 'steel pan society.’
3. Cats and Rocking chairs
http://morven-catsandrockingchairs.blogspot.com/READ MORE OF THESE QUALITY PERSPECITVES ON SOCIETY BY CLICKING BELOW
Essentially, Freast want to be her. This is not only due to our beginner blogger envy, but also has something to do with her apparently flawless wardrobe and the fact that she seems very clean. We expect she reciprocates the admiration.
4. Kate Bush
A karaoke favourite and constant inspiration to Freast, no one works the mental look quite like Kate Bush. Freast recommends youtubing 'Army Dreamers' and 'Wuthering Heights'. We'll be practising our cartwheels this week.
When daddies Freast lugged all our clobber up 3 flights of stairs, we promised ourselves this term would be different. Funnily enough, our belongings have yet to find themselves in the appropriate receptacles. The carpet is instead covered in a plethora of crates wontainging empty boxes of ‘flourescent fabric brush pens’ and papers entitled ‘Drinking: Units and You.’ Freast have yet to find a use for such a document, aside from calculating lad points.
2. Vitamin deficiency.
Happier days of orange juice drinking
In Freast’s mind, apple sourz and the beef and tomato flavoured pot noodle count as 2 of our 5 a day. Unfortunately, both seem to have had detrimental effects on our skin, hair and immune system. With no readily disposable funds or time for wholesome cooking and drinking, we're off to source Superdrugs finest 'A-Z Multivitamins and Minerals.'
3. Ends of sales
Having found some absolute wonders (mostly made of polyutherine) Freast aren't going to be able to handle full price Primark. Unfortunately most of the student loan has been squandered on frivolities like heating and electricity, so we're going to have to resort to wearing the snakeskin skirt over and over again. We can't think of a social situation which it's not appropriate for.
We're simply THRILLED we have to walk everywhere now that we're back at uni. Whilst it's highly convenient to be bereft of personal transport from a lash point of view (Freast abhor drink-driving), we're missing the TaTu at full blast and being forced to spoon in the back of the Yaris having had one too many.